What does it look like to build a life you truly love—one where your business uplifts others, your past becomes your power, and your voice creates space for healing? In this heartfelt interview, Jennifer Gardella shares her unfiltered story of surviving domestic violence, rebuilding with purpose, and creating a business rooted in flexibility, integrity, and empowerment. With honesty and clarity, she opens up about the habits, community, and values that helped her lead—on her own terms.
If you’re painting the picture of a life that you love, what does it look like to you?
A life that I love looks like being able to build something that supports a lot of small business owners, as well as my staff. My team is comprised mostly of women who have unusual circumstances in their lives where full-time work is not an option. I’ve really embraced this idea that “my empire” can give them the opportunity to stay with their child in the hospital overnight while still working. I don’t care when they’re working or where they’re working from, as long as their systems are protected.
My ideal life includes writing a book. Then the movie gets made. I already know who the cast is and who’s directing it. The movie wins an Academy Award, and then I go on Dancing with the Stars to let everybody know my mission.
I just want to be that voice of no shame, because there’s so much shame around domestic violence. I want to be able to look at women, men—everyone who’s involved—because it’s not just a battered woman issue, and say, “It’s okay. Let’s get you help.” I want there to be support systems for them. Because right now, we live in a society where abusers are protected. And we really need to start protecting the victims and survivors.
What role has community played in allowing you to build your business and work through some of your challenges?
Community is what you create for yourself. Wherever you go, no one shows up with a marching band on your front porch saying, “We’re so glad you’re here. Here are friends and contacts.” You have to build a community.
My community rapidly changed when I realized it was filled with a lot of people who were okay with me staying small. I had to rebuild in a lot of ways. That’s one of the reasons I joined Shadow Her. I needed a new community of people with bigger minds—people who were like, “Oh, we love where you are, Jen, but let’s kick up your game. We don’t need you to be the wounded one anymore. We get it—stuff happens.”
The business community up in Bucks County certainly embraced me. But it was also largely male-dominated. I’m the second woman to ever sit on the board, and the first woman president. I would sit in meetings—either on Zoom or in person—and think, “Where are the women? Where’s the color? Where’s the diversity?” There was none. That’s something I’m hoping to bring to the group.
Support groups for domestic violence victims are also part of building community. Many victims may not have anyone they can talk to about what’s going on. Community is about building those spaces where people feel safe, where it’s okay to speak up.
I come off as very authentic and open. People connect with me when I speak, because inevitably someone comes up to me afterward or messages me on LinkedIn saying, “Me too.” I’m like, “Really? Are you okay?” Then I can direct them to resources.
Community can be critical, with the caveat that you still need to be doing the work yourself. You can have all the best friends in the world, but you still need to be in the grind of building, whatever that looks like. And I don’t mean “grind” in a bad way—I just mean putting in the work.
What are some of the habits that you have that have allowed you to reach your level of success?
When I escaped domestic violence, we ran and hid in Pittsburgh for a month. I was scared out of my mind. We didn’t have a place to live after that month. I thought, “What am I going to do?” I started gratitude journaling every day. Then I started Morning Pages. Afterwards, I walked the dog. I’ve never had really good habits in my business until recently. My business grew up in domestic violence, and just like a child or person that lived in domestic violence, all my business really knew was chaos. All I really knew was chaos.
Once I got in touch and in tune with that, I was able to say, “Okay, my business needs therapy,” which was really fascinating. I have an ops director who has been with me since the beginning, who has walked this path, sometimes knowing what I was going through, sometimes not, but always saying, “This is what I need from you,” and hanging in there until I got to this point. I’m incredibly grateful to her.
Now we’re putting new habits in place. When a new client comes in, it’s going to be a coordinated plan, unlike before. That’s one of the biggest ways I’m showing leadership to my team.
A big habit of mine right now is working until it gets done. I’ve had some monster contracts come in lately, which is so exciting. I can’t operate the same way I was, but also, the way I need to be operating isn’t just some system we can install—it’s going to take hours, sometimes late hours. A habit of mine is simply getting it done, which is brand new for me.
What do you think is the key to helping more women step into their power and lead with confidence?
Being authentic is the key to confidence.
I just started a new speaking offering because, let’s be honest, when you speak on digital marketing, no one listens anymore. So now I talk about business development—how you need to have your four pieces of a business development plan. There are a lot of reasons why we have to do it this way. I do have the magic system.
But one of the things I talk about is how you have to be authentic. First of all, my story of how I crawled out of hell, and how I’m willing to talk about that vulnerability, including saying, “I got myself into this,” really reaches people. A lot of people in the audience have either been through it or are currently in the middle of it, and they relate to me.
The other thing I say is: I do not have a best-selling book. People are like, “What?” Everyone else plays the game, gets the screenshot, says they’re a bestseller, and sells five copies a month like I do. No one’s a true best-selling author.
People are shocked. “Oh my God, are you actually admitting you’re not a best seller?” I’m like, “I’m not. I hope to be someday, when I do the big memoir because that memoir is going to be better than the book I have out there now.”
People really connect with that. “Wow, she is not full of bullshit. She’s just throwing it all out there.”
Nowadays, it feels like everybody has a best-selling book. Everybody has a #1 podcast. Everyone’s magically lined up all their degrees. Everybody’s lying out there.
I come at it from a place of: yes, I have an actual PhD from Rutgers, that’s legitimate. But I don’t have a best-selling book. I do have a business that has struggled. And people say, “Me too.”
If you could rewrite the rules for women, how would you edit those rules?
How did we go from assertive men to bitchy women?
Women’s personalities and the way we act are still judged through the lens of the 1950s. If I could rewrite one rule, it would be: we are in 2025, just like the men are.
When people find me intimidating, which they often do, I know, because I’ve done the work, that it has nothing to do with me. They choose to find me intimidating. That word, intimidating, is brutal. But you don’t call men those things. You don’t criticize men about their outfits. Men are paid their value by others. Women’s value is questioned constantly.
People have said to me, “Well, you can’t charge me what you charge your other clients. I’m not as big, or I’m not that organization that’s paid you that.” And I respond, “No, I can. First of all, it’s my business.”
I’ve started to say to people, “You would never say that to a man.”
I would love, in the business community, to see some equalizing in how people interpret women’s actions and their value.
What’s the legacy that you hope to leave?
The legacy I hope to leave is: I saved all the victims of domestic violence.
Not necessarily that I prevented it or stopped it but that people got out when they saw the signs, and that they had all the support they needed when it was happening.
I want to leave a legacy related to digital marketing, too, because business owners get really bad advice and need access to expert digital marketing support that they can afford. The legacy I want to leave through my digital marketing business is this idea of integrity in marketing.
Jennifer Gardella, PhD, CEO of The Gardella Group helps business owners and marketing teams build and execute strategic digital marketing plans to attract ideal clients. Through her work at JenniferGardella.com she offers domestic violence impact and awareness training. As a survivor, she is on a mission to educate everyone on how domestic violence impacts 85% of us each day, robs businesses of 1-3% of their bottom line, and provides resources to victims and survivors. Her book, Domestic Violence Awareness, Listen for the Whispers of Abuse is available on Amazon.
